Polish Jokes 波蘭笑話集翻譯 (6)
Q: How do you stop a Polish tank?
A: Shoot the guys pushing it.
There was this Polish woman who just delivered a baby.
Her doctor came into her room
and saw her with a bag of ice in between her breasts.
Her doctor asks how come?
She says, "that's to keep the milk fresh."
Q: Why are there only two pallbearers at a Polish funeral?
A: A garbage can only has two handles.
Q: How do you know when a Pollack has been in your back yard?
A: Your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant.
Q: Why don't Polish women breast-feed their babies?
A: It hurts too much when they boil the nipples.
Q: How does a polack take a shower?
A: Pee's in the wind.
Q: How do you make a pollock crazy?
A: Stick him a round room and tell him to piss in a corner!
A Pollack walked into a bar and sat down at the bar, where a news report was on TV.
On the news a man was on a ledge outside an upper floor of a building threatening to jump.
The bartender, who'd seen the news report before said,
"I'll bet you $50 he's going to jump."
The Pollack took the bet and put down a $50 bill on the bar.
Then the man on the ledge jumped to his death.
The bartender picked up the $50 bill but then, realizing that he'd taken advantage of a poor, dumb Pollack,
his conscience got the better of him and he said,
"Look, I'm going to give you back your money. I have to confess that I saw that news report before."
"That's O.K.," said the Pollack, "I saw it before too, but I didn't think he was gonna do it again!"
註：his conscience got the better of him 這句我改成中文比較ok的說法。
The first Polish spacecraft was put into orbit with two astronauts.
One of them took a space walk to repair something on the exterior of the spacecraft.
When he was done he knocked on the airlock's inner door.
And the other Pollack asked, "Who's there?"
Q: Why are Pollacks the only ones who eat shit?
A: They're the only ones who know how to cook it.
註：讓我想到 這個新聞 XD
Q: Why do they they throw shit on the walls at a Polish wedding?
A: To keep the flies off the bride.
Q: What does a Pollack use to clean salad bowls?
A: A bowl brush.
Did you hear of the polac who was told to blow up a car?
He burnt his mouth on the exhaust pipe.
Q: What's the biggest problem of Polish dump operators?
A ventriloquist had just finished his Pollack joke routine
when a huge, drunk Pollack confronted him,
"I'm sick of your Pollack jokes and I'm going to knock the shit out of you."
"I'm sorry, it was all in good fun, " replied the comedian.
The Pollack retorted, "I was talking to little asshole on your knee."
A Pollack walked into a bar with dogshit in his hand and said to the bartender,
"Look what I almost stepped it!"
A Pollack walked in to a pizza place and ordered a pizza.
The pizza man asked him, "Should I cut it into six pieces or eight?"
And the Pollack answered, "Cut it into six; I couldn't eat eight."
Q: Have you heard about the Polish cocktail?
A: Perrier and water.
Q: What's the most popular Polish fast-food restaurant?
A: Booger King.
Q: 波蘭最知名的速食餐廳是什麼？A: 鼻屎王。
Q: Why do Polish airplanes fly so low?
A: So the pilots can read the street signs.